I was talking to my secondary school friend Cheekeat on MSN...cos...he happen to be asking me something on MSN, we weren't exactly having a conversation...but anyway he saw my nick..cos I put it as...i am in crossroad....and...he said...welcome to cross road...thereafter, I told him that I have already made a choice...so I already made my choice but I am not sure if I made the right choice...then he said

Dun worry.. as long u have choose it, it's never a wrong road.. cos every road we have walked thru, there's always some experiences gain.. good or bad experience, it's still a good road as long as u put in ur heart to walk it thru.. all the best..

N frankly speaking...I haven been having a real talk with CK for the longest time...sometimes I do talk to him...when we were in NTU..but it has never come across my mind that he is such a profound and philosophical person :P Anyway...I then tell him how amaze I was...hearing him say this...then he came up with another sentence..which made me more wow....

when shits keep pouring in, just step on it to climb higher

Actually, I do share the same sentiment with him...and thats why I chose that path I have chosen...just that, I love how he puts it hahaha...especially this part...about stepping on shit to climb higher...wahahah...


Initially...i was actually really at a cross road...but...I have made a choice over the weekend...whereby the choice is made based on what I really want...rather than mmm external factors like...stability...actually...i think...stability is very important...especially during times like this...which leaves me in a hard decision...but again, it occur to me that..whats the point of stability if u know u are uncomfortable with that idea? Cos..u will still leave it since u are uncomfortable with doing something..which makes stability useless in that sense...


Besides that, I was also reminded that...actually, completing the degree wasnt my intent...my actual intend was to drop out cos I knew it was a poor fit...I was struggling badly with engineering modules which aint my forte(cos I did an IT diploma and totally clueless with engineering maths + modules)......and then go do something which I think suits me...or study something that suits me better..but I did not...cos other than completing a degree...it was also fulfilling a promise that was made to someone whom I love dearly, my Dad...so that's why i completed it....and I am glad that it has brought me to where I am now..cos I really love the job(n no, its not an engineering job thankfully haha)...however, the process of obtaining the degree was very very tough for me...and labelled as the downest time in my life..cos I am not doing something I like...I am knowingly doing something I dread...and having gone through this, I think all the more, now, given a choice, I should really choose something for myself(cos previously i did it for my dad)....cast away external factors...for..this is what I really wanna pursue...and this is what I really wanna do...and I dont wish to live with any regrets...and based on this, I chose the road I decided on...and I hope it was a great choice...


Aside from this...again...once again, we are touching on this same old topic...my love life..it seems that my day to day conversation with friends are always about my love life...people love to ask me how issit...and some tell me why I am still single...a mixure of reasons...

1. cos u are too outgoing...guys dont know what you want..like if u r really interested in them or are u as nice to any other guys(really?)

2. cos u have very high expectation...but i managed to convince them to fine tune into weird expectations according to the criteria they think i have...haha

Anyway...I dont really agree with point 1...cos...guys whom I like before, u can go ask them, I think they will be very sure that i like them...cos when i like someone, i think its really obvious...and many a times, I will do a lot for them..n btw, most of the time, i am quite quiet..and behave abnormally in front of them hahaha!!!

as for the second point...the so call weird expectation...seriously, is because, like what the test has told u...I just need to really love someone before I get into a r/s with them...how, tell me how can u get into a r/s with someone u dont like...feeling is really important u know...if not, if he hold my hand i will brush it away and scold him or kick him in the ass wahahaha....

So...just let it be la..cos I truly agree that love comes naturally in the way it wants ...and not by seeking...and if i meet the wrong guy n still get into a r/s with them, i will still break up with them ma...so...why start? so....leave it to the one up there... :)