Ok...its blogging time again....

The past one week was pretty much of a 'happening' one week for me..lots of things...happening..not gonna talk in detail here...cos some stuff are better to be left unsaid...but I can say, I think I have learn lots from it...there were a mixture of emotions...among all, what that was worth talking about...is that, I am glad to feel touched...and....feel cared..by some people...:) thanks to u guys..whoever u are...to let me feel such nice things...and so, sometimes, I do think that I am quite blessed :)


As i was quite tied up with all these, I didnt have the mood to practise my keyboard, nor do I have the mood to re record my demo...the demo which I had to hand in next week....in fact, I almost felt like skipping my melody class...not because I am not serious about that class...but because, my mind is all about this particular something and this something is very very important to me....and I am not in the mood to do anything else...and it was through that happening that made me realised that...actually this something...was what i really value...not that I dont value it on normal days..but...in a way, I didnt think that I will value it that much...anyway, lucky for me, I started my demo much earlier...so I have already done up a version which i thought should be good enough to be handed in to my teacher...so its true that one should always do their homework or work in advance..cos u never know if things will crop up later :)

Anyway, having gone through that, I think...what I thought about myself wasnt quite right...as always, I am a well known emo pie...who shed tears easily...in fact, during my teeny years, I shed tears very readily ahahaha...as in, u can hardly count the number of times I cry...cos the occurence was too frequent to be counted...ya, I am pretty soft hearted....but as I grew older, I thought i have became less soft hearted...so thats why I am crying less frequently...in fact, the last time I really cried...was like...mmm not to take into things such as drama shows into account, crying for myself, I guess, the last time I cried really hard...was when my dad passed away....though I have repeated umpteen times about how hard my uni life was, I think I didnt really shed any tears...even if i did,i am sure i didnt cry that hard..cos, I truly understand that crying doesnt help...and yes, I understand that many many years ago...but hey, sometimes, errr I think tears are hard to be hold back...anyway, I thought my ability of holding back tears has improved...as in, maybe I became hard hearted or something..hahaha...I thought I will never shed tears as readily as I used to....even for dramas....I used to be easily triggered by sad sad soap drama..but apparently, as I get older...the soap drama that can really made me cry greatly reduce in numbers too..or songs (ya some songs can make me cry, cos they are soooo well written)....but these days, I cant even recall what song actually made me cry....and...ya, my assumption did hold...for long enough...tilll mmm last week...when I went through some...mmm I wouldnt say hard time...but just....something unexpected...and then, when I tried to hold back my tears...cos that process did made me hurt + sad + disappointed+ angry(in fact very disappointed), but as always, I will not shed tears in front those who thinks I look vulnerable...plus, I always tell myself, they aint worth it....and as I tried real damn hard to hold it back, cos I cry when i am angry too hahaha....anyway, I did hold it till this person, whom I deeply respect...came online and talked to me....without even knowing the exact details of my encounter...as in, she only had a rough idea...and without even seeing me face to face, she actually managed to know how I felt...and wrote this something...that in a way touched me...

smile and the whole world smile with u...

cry and u cry alone

so, are u smiling yet?

These words....made me tear immediately...cos...how would someone be able to see me so transparently...as in..even without seeing me...even without really hearing me yet, how can someone so appropriately understand how one feels? I was deeply amazed by how she did that...and of cos deeply touched to hear all these from her...


In case u are wondering...I am not really sad or what...I was just...a bit caught by surprise by what has happened...and I have more or less straighten out my thoughts... :) N felt much much better :)N sometimes, I think things happen for a reason...and, yes, like what I mentioned in previous post...I do agree with what cheekeat says...there is always 2 sides to a story...be it a bad/good experience, u always get both good and bad out of it....and..what doesnt make u die..just makes u stronger :)